So Unsatisfying

Sometimes I tell someone I have RA and it doesn’t even register on their face. Like I just told them I have a cold or silver/gray hair. Colds go away in 10 days (if we’re not immune suppressed), but RA is forever.

It’s just frustrating … so I thought I’d share with you.  Even though you didn’t ask.

I wish I could tell the person that the easiest response is, “So what does that mean for you?” They don’t have to know anything about RA to ask me that. And I can choose how much I tell them … which depends on mood and the “need to know” factors.

Phew. Got that of my chest. Thanks for listening.

3 Comments

  1. Wren
    Sep 14, 2010

    I empathize. It hurts when you tell someone about a condition that affects you every single day in negative ways, from pain and disability to meds that make you feel ill — and they shrug your words off as if they were meaningless.

    Happens to me all the time. I wish that people would listen better and be less self-absorbed, but it seems that’s just the way it is. I try not to let it bug me too much. But please know I DO understand. If you were talking to me, I’d be listening and asking questions.

    Be well. Look for the gifts. :)

  2. lana
    Sep 15, 2010

    Because I am a patient advocate, people ask me questions about RA and actually take the time to listen. There was time, however, that it was not true. But you are best off telling people you have an autoimmune disease that does this and that….When they ask what, you can tell them the name.

  3. thislusciousra
    Sep 19, 2010

    Lana – never thought of just saying I have an autoimmune disease. I guess I thought that would be more confusing for people than just saying I have RA. Do you find that people are more aware of autoimmune diseases as a category?

    Thanks!
    Barbara

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